Lime-cilantro vinaigrette

I'm not actually a major fan of plums, so I'm going with lime for this installment of Cooking with Baby (h/t to Catherine for that disturbing yet apt label).

Even before searching, I was like...margaritas and key lime pie: TOO OBVIOUS. While I do love both of those things, you can easily Google them if you want to make them or, really, just go to a restaurant. I'd like to provide ideas that are a little more interesting but still easy and versatile. Let's just say that not all my friends are wizards in the kitchen--though I've always thought this stemmed more from lack of confidence than lack of actual skill. I believe in you, friends!

On that note, I present:

Lime-Cilantro Vinaigrette

Disclaimer: unlike the rest of the recipes on this blog so far, I have not actually made this one. Hence the stolen photo. Your feedback is welcome.

Original source, via Pinterest

Ingredients

1/4 cup lime juice

2 tbsp white or white wine vinegar

1/2 bunch cilantro, chopped*

1 tbsp brown sugar

1 clove garlic, minced

1/4 tsp salt

3/4 tsp spicy brown or dijon mustard

3/4 cup olive oil

* for the herbally uncertain among us (you know who you are...) cilantro looks like this:

Blend the lime juice, vinegar, and cilantro together in a blender until smooth. Add the brown sugar, garlic, and salt; blend again until smooth. Spoon the mustard into the mixture. Turn the blender on and slowly pour the olive oil into the dressing mixture in a thin stream; blend until thoroughly combined.

Put on a salad or something. 

Exciting news! After many, many requests from readers (2), I have decided to activate commenting. Also, I was lonely. I will still moderate them--do you hear that, mean people I don't know??--but now we can see each other. This will be an experiment for the time being. This is more complicated than I originally thought, so they might not show up right away. 

The Rules of Engagement

or, "Why We Have This Blog."

(Heads up: This is a long and text-heavy post, and it contains my opinions. It may or may not be relevant to your life. It even sat for a while before I hit Publish, because I'm not sure I want to be anything other than fun and fluffy here.)

Of course, our stated goal has been and remains keeping those near and dear to us updated on the happenings, even if those special people are geographically far away. This is one of the beautiful things about modern technology.

But there's also another reason. And that reason is this: there are things that do not belong on Facebook.  I will pause and share this article with you, because I think it sums up this idea nicely (while it digresses somewhat at the end into Why Hipsters Do Not Like Babies, it still captures this phenomenon).

New York Times: "Unbaby.me Keeps Babies Off Facebook"

Here's the thing...I'm in that life phase where many of my friends (and, fine, old "acquaintances" I should really pare down) are indeed "popping babies like muffins." Even though I myself am now Poppin' Fresh, I don't want to see it. Yes, I want to know when the baby is born and everyone's ok. I'd like to see an especially cute or squishy or humorous image from time to time. You could never accuse me of hating babies. But I do not need your daily update. What it basically comes down to is this: Facebook is not, and should not be thought of as, "everyone's blog." Blogger is free. This is America. You can have your own blog.

To be fair, the blame does not lie entirely with the proud (oversharing) parents. Beneath every gratuitous baby bump or baby photo, you will almost certainly find at least one gushing comment imploring the poster to "post more pictures" or "keep us updated!" This person is almost always a well-meaning older second cousin or great-great-aunt or somebody's grandmother, which touches on another separate but related issue that will not be discussed in this post: What Happened When Our Parents Got On Facebook. But the fact is that this simply reinforces the behavior and encourages the cycle to continue.

(I will quickly point out that my mom and aunt are both on Facebook and are very, very good at it (one by never using it and one by actually being good at it). I am talking about OTHER PEOPLE'S relatives. Almost daily I think very, very hard about hiding someone's mom from my news feed. I know this is my fault for accepting their friend request in the first place, but...manners. You can't reject someone's mom. There's the rub.)

Anyway, I make a series of promises to you. After all, you come here on purpose knowing that you are going to see baby-related things (rather than having it forced down your throat on your news feed because, what? Like you're not going to check Facebook ever?). If you're visiting someone's blog, you're exercising a choice. Facebook, while not mandatory in life, isn't quite the same way.

• Never ever shall I post an ultrasound picture on FB. As my sister (a nurse practitioner) says: if women knew what parts of their bodies those things showed, they would NOT be posting them all up on there.
• Profile pictures are for the purpose of identifying the owner of the profile. If you want to be in the picture with your baby, that is cute. But it can't be just a photo of your baby, because you aren't your baby. Also, under no circumstances should your profile picture be an ultrasound picture (see above).
• The word "dilated," or derivation thereof (in the context of childbirth) has no place in a status update. If you cannot identify a subgroup of important people who should receive text alerts or emails when baby is en route, you may not be ready for an actual child.
• Ok, now, this one is sensitive. And will make me sound meaner than this post already has, but I know you're with me: sometimes, especially in the beginning, babies are weird looking. This is totally ok, because one of the beauties of nature is that every parent thinks his or her newborn baby is the most gorgeous creature who ever lived. Evolution has given us this gift. Some babies even ARE actually good looking early on. But when I'm checking the FB with my morning coffee, sometimes I get surprised with a pic that is...not flattering. And then BOOM I've thought a cringe-y thought about your baby. And then I see it's you, and I feel terrible, because I like you and I know your baby is actually going to turn out just fine with a little time and de-wrinkling. So please don't make me feel terrible before I've had my coffee; it's already hard enough out there. 
• This one is more serious, but might be the most important. Some people don't have babies--this may be by choice or by circumstance. Some people might want them eventually, but aren't quite there yet. You don't know how these people feel about where they are in life, so a little sensitivity might be warranted. They can be happy for you but still have complex emotions about the matter, (such as "how is this going to change our friendship?" or "is everyone leaving me behind?") which is normal and understandable. Still other people might want babies right now, but for whatever reason, it's not happening for them. One of the things I've learned so far is that, as soon as you start trying to get pregnant, it feels like EVERYONE around you suddenly does--faster than you, and better than you, and more excitedly than you. Some people, whom you irrationally hate, "weren't even trying!" Guys, this is really hard, and we didn't even struggle with achieving the goal by any medical standard. Seeing other people's babies and bumps and listening to their "gripes" can really exacerbate the nagging feelings of doubt in your body or your plan that you are trying really hard to push out of your mind. Now, I'm not trying to imply that everything we post is or should be self-censored to an extreme degree just because someone somewhere might have feelings. But after walking that road, I've pledged that I will henceforth be as sensitive as possible when sharing our news or inquiring about the family plans of others, because you just don't know where other people are in their lives. So many well-meaning people asked when we'd be "getting started" (or made not-so-well-meaning "tick-tock" comments)--and it takes all your resolve not to burst into tears when it's just not happening for you. So a little bit of consideration can't hurt us, no?

This is a partial list, and will grow as I navigate this new world more. I would also welcome your suggestions for The Rules, because I know I'm not alone here (right?). You also have my permission to email me this very post if I ever break one of the rules. 

I will now return my soapbox to its home.

And, finally, because the New York Times says people like it so much, here is a picture of some bacon instead: 

Figgy Focaccia

So all last week (when fetus was a fig), I kept thinking to myself "what IS figgy pudding?" I still don't really know, but somebody, at some point, thought it was appropriate to demand it of holiday carolers.

This is not figgy pudding, but you can learn what it looks like here. We'll leave it at that.

Then I randomly came across this recipe for fig focaccia, and then I had more thoughts. What if every week I tried to find a recipe related to the fruit or item that provides the size reference for bebe? I realize that this has a very weird element--find a way to eat the thing that is the size of your baby--but it also provides another dimension in addition to me just answering the same questions every week. I'm sure that's not thrilling to read, and it can feel like I'm answering a survey in a vacuum (like Survey Thursday, but alone).

So let's give it a whirl and see how weird things get.

12 weeks

How Far Along: 12 weeks. BAM. Adios, first trimester.

*Technically, I presume that the first trimester ends at the END of week 12, but let's just go with it, people.

Total Weight Gain: Let's just say it's in the normal for the first trimester. 

Size of Baby: Depending on the source (which highly scientific email newsletter), a plum or a lime. 

en Francais, c'est "une prune"

une chaux

This week, we'll have REFLEXES! It's exciting. Baby will start moving his/her mouth, fingers and toes will curl, eyes--which are now in their proper location on the front of the head--will start to move. The major milestone at this point is that the development phase is largely complete, and baby moves into the growth and maturation phase. So most of the little working parts are there in some form, but now they just need to get bigger and move into their proper places (e.g., intestines are still on the outside of the body. Get those suckers IN.)

Maternity Clothes: The Bella Band came out for the first time on Tuesday. The blue jeans officially no longer button (though I will loudly note that the white jeans DO still fit). Perhaps it would be a little more precise to say that, while the jeans would probably button in the morning, they'd be reeeeally uncomfortable by the afternoon, so I saved myself the embarrassment of needing to unbutton my pants while leading a training for a roomful of people. The next challenge will be a social event on Friday night--do I wear a regular dress and look casually bloated? We shall see. 

Gender: ??

Movement: None for me to feel. Apparently at this point, if I were to prod my own abdomen, baby would squirm in response, but the plum is still a bit too wee for me to notice the reaction.

Sleep: I don't want to jinx myself, but I think the extreme, bone-shattering fatigue might be lessening somewhat. I am sleeping more normally (i.e., not like the dead). The extreme dreams continue. This week I have:

• played football for Ensworth. I was definitely pregnant, and we used a basketball instead of a football. There was also a solid Harry Potter subplot. 
• become friends with Kate Middleton on a cross-country bus tour of England.
• painstakingly handwritten the names of 5 (five) Chinese restaurants.
• competed in the 4 x 100 medley relay at the City Meet. All the usual suspects from the swim team days were there, so that was fun/weird. However, there was also a faceless nameless swimmer on the relay. He/she encountered many obstacles in the course of his/her leg: officials in the water blocking the way, an ever-lengthening pool, etc. So by the time I dove in to swim my anchor leg, we were so far behind that the race was over and the lifeguards were removing the lane lines. Analyze THAT. 

I don't think I fully remember my dream this morning (beyond the fact that there was a large block party of some sort), so maybe the end of the fatigue also means the end of the Magical Mystery Tour. 

What I miss: Brushing my teeth without trepidation. I cannot remember or comprehend how normal, non-pregnant people perform this task without gagging. 

Cravings: Cinnamon buns. Smoothie King. Breakfast in the afternoon (but DEFinitely not in the morning). Spaghetti. I mean, for perspective, these aren't go-get-it-right-now-at-3am sorts of cravings...just things that sound good that probably would be considered odd by normal people's standards. 

Other crazy symptoms: Random crying (at Olympics, Pinterest, Batman). Round ligament pain--at least, that's what I hope it is. That shizz is no joke...it will take your breath away. So far it's when I sneeze and sometimes at night (after rolling over or something, I think). 

Best Moment this week: I started making a registry and other plans, which made me truly excited that there's actually a little nugget joining us. I think that the beginning is so full of uncertainty and what-ifs that I didn't allow myself to be fully excited, so it's nice that it seems like that's behind us a little. 

I wanted to post today to get this one up, but tomorrow morning we have a big ultrasound. They will look around and take measurements to see that everything looks like it should, and that there aren't any abnormalities on which they'd want to follow up. So I look forward to sharing what I hope is a good report and maybe some photos. I will feel much, much better with that one behind us. 

Le body pillow

This sexy beast shipped today:

Oh yeah. Come to your new home, Cozy Comfort body pillow. Apparently the aches and pains start up pretty early--I always assumed it was due to belly and associated weight, but apparently you make all these hormones (relaxin) to loosen things up starting pretty early. (Aside: every time I read about this, I think to myself "chillin' out, maxin', relaxin all cool...") I've had some minor hip discomfort, and have always liked having some extra pillows around, so I thought I'd just bite the bullet. I am not sure if this thing will actually fit in the bed (with room for, you know, another person), but we'll see how it goes. 

Lucky for me, I was just thinking about ordering one when they popped up on Gilt. This is one of the (many, many) fabulous things about Gilt. I never noticed that they had lots of maternity/baby stuff before, but it turns out they run something in that category just about every day. And I mean the good stuff, not the terrible excuses for clothing that are out there. So...while I am envious of people pinning "cute fall outfits!" and "party dresses!" and "skinny pants!" that I will not be wearing for, oh, the next YEAR, I can still get my shopping fix on Gilt and feel like maybe I haven't entirely left the world of cool and stylish people. 

Stay tuned for the adventures of le body pillow--because these are the real dramas in life. 

11 weeks

Everything seemed good at this morning's checkup, though it was much less thorough than the last visit. We heard baby's heartbeat on the Doppler, which was fun--if not quite as monumental as it is in the movies. They took more blood, but far, far less than the 46-gallon draw of the previous appointment. That one put me on my back for the next 24 hours, but this recovery shouldn't be so bad.

How Far Along: 11 weeks. Baby A is now officially a fetus (no longer an embryo). I suspect Hallmark does not make a card for this. 

Total Weight Gain: No sir. Not as bad as I had feared, however. 

Size of Baby: One site says the size of a fig, while another says lime. Baby has a 1:1 head-to-body ratio, see-through skin, and tooth buds. In other words, s/he's a real looker. 

Here's a quarter for your fig.

Maternity Clothes: No, but to be fair, I've been living in Lulu all week so I don't have a true sense of the situation. Stretchy pants are the new pants. The doctor congratulated me on still being in pre-pregnancy pants this morning, so I'll take it. 

Stretch Marks: Come on. 

Gender: ??

Movement: None to feel, but he/she apparently likes to kiiiick and streeeetch while there's still plenty of room. 

Sleep: Having some trouble falling asleep, despite being tired. Once I do, though, it's smooth sailing. Other than the dreams. Most recently, I've been:

• taking a Greyhound bus to Florida with my sister
• scheduled to meet Morgan Freeman in his hotel room, Room 8C
• collecting dissertation data. Pretty literal, except that my child participant was the kid from Modern Family

What I miss: Having any energy? Not being so stinkin' tired all.the.time. 

Cravings: None to speak of this week. I've been taking it a little easy on the food front as some surprise nausea popped up over the last few days. I was just glad to see that 2 months of a high-carb diet hadn't resulted in a 40-pound weight gain, so I'll continue with the little-kid diet a bit longer. Maybe amazon sells Kalteen bars?

Other crazy symptoms: Some pretty solid teenage acne. I did actually fall over at the gym for no reason once, so maybe that damn book was right about clumsiness. Also, sometimes I feel like this:

Best Moment this week: Just being reassured that there's still a little heartbeat in there. Getting back to the gym (extreme soreness notwithstanding). Re-entry from vacation hasn't been fun, but it's good to see people and catch up. 


Next week we have a big ultrasound--measurements, etc.--so I'll feel better after that one when we'd ideally see that things are progressing as they should. It seems like as soon as you clear one hurdle, there's another milestone to worry about, but I'm just trying to take it all in stride. While The Book describes all the terrible scary stuff that can happen, it also reassures readers that "the vast majority of pregnancies are uneventful," so I just try to remember that. I think these questions tend to skew toward the negative aspects of the experience (or maybe that's just me), but all in all, it hasn't been nearly as bad as I'd feared or been led to believe. So I'm grateful for that and definitely don't want to be a complainer. There's plenty of time for that later on. 

10 weeks

So this is the first official "update" post...apparently the thing to do is answer this set of questions periodically. I will edit them freely and roll my eyes often, but I do see the appeal of having some consistent items so that we can see a progression. I'm also about as likely to "journal" as I am to suddenly have Beyonce's bootylicious moves, so I'll consider this captured for posterity. For the record, I will generally eschew references to the bump, and all its derivatives (bumpdate, bumpwatch).

How Far Along: 10 weeks

Total Weight Gain: You people have got to be kidding if you think I'm going to post my weight on the interwebs. Suffice it to say I feel like a Ziploc of Jello. This question will be disposed of post haste. 

Size of Baby: According to different sources, a kumquat, date, or prune. A panel of esteemed judges has opted to go with kumquat, as we think the other items are too wrinkly. For reference:

a baby tree!

Maternity Clothes:  Not yet. The blue jeans won't last much longer, but I think I'll be able to make do with many "regular" clothes for a while.

Stretch Marks: No, and I hope it stays that way. This question also faces elimination, because ew. 

Gender: Unknown, and won't know for a while. The peanut gallery all say boy, but I won't speculate.

Movement: None for me to feel, but apparently the wee one has started to boogie in there.

Sleep: Fine. Want more all the time. Very vivid dreams that I can recall the next day, which is unusual.

What I miss: Cocktail hour. Not so much the actual drinks, but I find myself feeling left out at that certain time in the evening (afternoon) when everyone simultaneously heeds some invisible signal to transition into wine-and-cheese hour. It should be noted that we are on vacation, so it's quite the event. I don't actually miss drinking in any tragic way, but there's certainly something to be said for the social ritual. 

Cravings: So far, I haven't had extreme cravings or aversions--just what I have referred to as "sounds good/sounds bad." I don't know if this is because I truly haven't had cravings, or because my threshold is different from other people's. I will say that lemonade helps the occasional squishy-tummy feeling, and I'm generally on a little-kid diet (muffins, grilled cheese, Gatorade, pasta). I'm looking forward to feeling like tackling better (i.e., more healthful) food again, and I think that's probably not too far away.

Other crazy symptoms: You'll rue the day you suggested your husband read a baby book, because all I'm hearing is that I'm going to be clumsy and forgetful with gingivitis. However, I seem to have dodged those bullets for now. My gums are a little sore, but I won't give him the satisfaction of using his new favorite refrain, "Yes, that's typical."

Best Moment this week: Discovering that this Brie is pasteurized. Giving up the wine AND cheese just seemed too cruel. I will be forever grateful for this revelation.